Love - Egoic love or true love?

Love is the most beautiful thing there is. In fact, it’s the only real thing there is. 

But what we humans see as love is something really different. Love from the mind’s (ego) point of view is made up out of rules and expectations about how to behave in a relationship. Also sacrifice and guilt is a massive part of egoic love. ‘’You don’t make enough time for me so you don’t love me enough’’. The ego demands sacrifice as evidence for love. It measures love from the amount of sacrifice you are willing to make. and if you don’t give enough, it will make you or the other person feel guilty about it. Which is ironic because nothing is ever enough for the ego. Its really important to remember this fact, it will never be enough to the ego. When you find yourself proving your love to someone or if you find yourself demanding prove for love or security from the other person, you are identified with the ego and you will lose at all cost. You will never do enough to make another persons ego satisfied and the other way around is the exact same; your mind will also never have enough security or prove to get it at peace. your mind will maybe be at rest for five minutes and then the next insecurity will pop up and there you go again. We all know examples for this. The mind will throw fear after fear after fear at you. Mixed with doubts and analyses about how the other person is behaving this will be a recipe for disaster.

So in short, The ego is always out for shaming, blame gaming or sacrificing. Its either projected on yourself or on to the other person. It doesn’t take sides, it isnt out for anyone in particular it is just always seeking and demanding in some kind of way. By identifying with this, which simply means; believing it to be true, you will ruin your shot at true love. Underneath this egoic love (which we all have!), there is pure, true and honest love possible. You just need to see through the tricks of the mind. Does this mean you will never get hurt again? Or you will have a perfect happily ever after. No not at all. you will have the exact same outcome as you would have had in the first place, you are destined to be together or you are not. but your experience of this love will be completely different. If you are able to stay with that deep inner peace inside yourself and not play along with the mind’s game you will experience deep and pure love with yourself and the other person. You will see how free and loving you both are and how everyone gives it their best shot and the outcome will not matter anymore. You don’t need to hear that someone will never leave you, you won’t need the other person to be there answering you messages 24/7, you will be free of al demands and wishes that egoic love needs to survive. The person you love will be by your side because they choose to be there. They will love you because they want to and you are able to give a love so free of charge that they will feel the freedom to walk away at any point but choose to stay because of the love they feel instead of the commitment they made. That’s true love.🤍

Lina Rosa